I woke up this morning feeling still really heavy burdened. I know from my last post I left you probably wondering what the heck was going on, and while I still don't feel it completely necessary to share it all with you, I do feel necessary to share what I am learning. Just so you know it's NOT my family or my health and for this I'm thankful, it is still a big deal and a BIG situation and a pretty stressful one too. But since I love to share, you all know that, I felt I would at least share what I am discovering.
There may not be pictures (and this is hard for me since I'm such a visual person) and there may be days where it's just words, whether a few or a lot, but I feel that by sharing it will be therapeutic probably more so for me and if along the way it is for you too, then I'm thankful for that.
I read Elizabeth's post this morning and it so touched me as many other's I've been reading out there this past week have, like Shelley's blog where she's having to find a new home, her journey and outlook will touch you too. I know we all go through trials and tribulations and none of us are exempt from this. Some harder for others, I believe it's where you place your focus, that will determine your outlook. Will you focus only on the situation? It's like having a coin directly in front on your eye, that's all you see is the large coin. But if you will move the coin back a few inches from your eye you'll see your surroundings. It's the same with the trial you're going through as well.
While sometimes all I can do is focus on the situation, it consumes me. I can't sleep and my thought process is totally focused on that situation. But I also know that my God is far bigger than anything I'm going through!! I do hope by sharing with you that I won't lose anyone that normally comes to my blog to read about the latest adventure, and normally it's a positive one, some place I've been, or shopped, or found but if I do lose you then all I can say is maybe eventually you'll come back and if not then I wish you well on your journey.
We all know life isn't about the where the next best adventure will be. Wouldn't it be great if it were just that simple. Sometimes reality just slaps you harder in the face than you've experienced in a long time. Yes, we all have our days, good or bad, and you bounce back I'm sure but sometimes in life there comes a point that you might not bounce back as quickly as you did before. The pressure or situation stays longer than you'd like. Let me add I'm no expert in giving advice about things, I'm only sharing from my heart.
This is what I've learned this week:
While I've always considered myself a Christian, I am human, I make mistakes, I don't always serve him like I should. I've learned this week that I am not alone in this situation. I do have people that care about me and my situation and there are those that are going through problems of their own, yes even more difficult ones than the one I'm going through. I so thank you for your emails, comments, calls, you are the best!! I also realized, some how I guess I forgot or didn't feel... (I don't know worthy or guilty or whatever word to fill in the blank) that I can still cry out to God, who will listen to me no matter what!! I've done a lot of crying to the point where my eyes have been swollen a lot. I don't tell you this for you to say you poor thing, but I think crying sometimes cleanses the soul.
Behold, I have refined you, but not as silver; I have tried you in the furnace of affliction. (Isaiah 48:10)
Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but God delivers him out of them all. (Psalm 34:19)
I am so glad I found this website, it has sure lifted my spirits: http://www.harderthanflint.com/2010/09/21/the-furnace-of-affliction/
I'll be doing a post soon to share who I saw yesterday and a great surprise that a friend told me about. I hope you all have an awesome July 4th weekend!!